The Power of Micro-Boundaries “At work, there are always emergencies I have to deal with.” “There’s always something to take care of at home.” “I’m constantly interrupted when I’m finally in deep focus.” “I feel guilty when I stop.” “If I say no, I worry I’ll be seen as lazy or unmotivated.” Sound familiar? We know how draining and disempowering these patterns are. We know the cost of always being available and pulled in every direction but our own. And yet, setting boundaries still feels out of reach. Many of us fall into an all-or-nothing mindset: “I’ll find balance when things calm down... when the project ends... when the kids are older...” But let’s be honest: life isn’t going to slow down magically. Waiting for the “perfect time” to reclaim your wellbeing is not a strategy worth pursuing. Moreover, we need to notice the inner saboteurs at play (possibly the pleaser, the perfectionist, or the avoider) and step into a more resourceful and empowering mindset. That’s where micro-boundaries come in: a realistic and sustainable new approach. These are small, doable strategies that help you shift from being constantly reactive to feeling in control, bit by bit, moment by moment. What Are Micro-Boundaries? Think of them as five-minute power moves, a micro appointment with your most important client: yourself! They create space to pause, reset, and recharge your energy—even in the middle of a busy day. Here are a few to try: The 5-Minute Recharge Ritual Each morning, take 5 minutes to name your non-negotiable appointment with yourself (a walk, lunch away from your desk, a call with someone who lifts you up). Say it out loud or write: “This is mine.” It reinforces your right to protect time that nourishes you. Guilt Reframe Use the clue of feeling cognitively depleted as an alarm to reframe rest as productive because: • “…I make better decisions.” • “…my team gets the best version of me.” • “…I’m modeling balance for my children.” Rewires the narrative that rest = weakness. Practice the “Graceful No” Draft a kind and confident script, like: “Thanks for thinking of me—my plate’s full right now, but I’d love to revisit this later.” Say it out loud once a day. Builds your boundary muscle so it’s strong when you need it most. The "2-Minute Transition Pause" Perfect for meeting marathons, Schedule a 2-minute buffer between meetings (even just mentally, if your calendar doesn't allow physical space). Use that time intentionally to reset before jumping into the next conversation. Mute notifications and close your laptop for 2 minutes. Take 3 deep breaths or stretch your shoulders. “What do I need for this next conversation?”Ask yourself: Even a short pause breaks the cycle of cognitive overload, lowers stress hormones, and helps you enter the next meeting more present, composed, and intentional. Why They Matter Micro-boundaries aren’t just strategies—they’re signals to yourself. They remind you that your time matters. And the more you practice them, the more you feel that spark of agency return. You notice the calm. The focus. The energy. And naturally, you want more. Experimenting is the only way to learn, so give it try! Change doesn’t come from big dramatic shifts—it comes from meaningful, consistent steps. So start small. Start now. And let micro-boundaries become your way back to clarity, confidence, and balance.

The Power of Improvisation! Growing up, we are taught that preparation and rehearsal are the keys to success. We learn from a syllabus, an externally imposed framework, and practice until we can confidently deliver what we’ve learnt. This becomes our default mode, one that we carry into adulthood. Preparation and rehearsal can indeed be successful strategies in school, where tests are often based on set topics. Even in our jobs, we know the importance of rehearsal. Whether it’s for a business presentation, an important meeting, or a job interview, rehearsing helps build confidence and provides a solid structure to rely on. However, life rarely follows a script More often than not, we encounter unexpected situations, face questions about topics we don’t fully master, and are required to think on our feet. Not knowing can feel uncomfortable because, as humans, we thrive on clarity, security, and predictability. There are also pivotal moments in life when change is necessary, and we are suddenly faced with the uncertainty of what’s next. There’s no script, no rehearsal, no certainty about what will work. In these instances, the fear of the unknown can leave us feeling stuck, procrastinating, and dominated by limiting beliefs. We focus on problems rather than possibilities. If preparing and rehearsing aren’t always the best approach, then what is another valuable option? Improvisation! Through my work, I’ve been fascinated by the transformative power of improvisation—not only as a tool for performing well in unexpected situations but also as a means to free ourselves when we feel stuck. More broadly, improvisation has the potential to change the way we approach life. What is Improvisation? Viola Spolin, the "mother of modern improvisation," defined it as “an experiential process that emphasizes being present in the moment.” At its core, improvisation is about presence, creativity, and adaptability—embracing uncertainty, building on what’s available, and trusting our instincts. It’s about accessing the knowledge and wisdom we already have and bringing them forward. Whether in performance, conversation, negotiation, decision-making, or moments of uncertainty, improvisation fosters openness, trust, collaboration, and a willingness to take risks without fear of failure. Wow! Now that’s what I call a powerful tool for life! But how do we improvise? What are the rules of the game? ✅ 1. Say "Yes!" In theatre, this means accepting what your fellow actor brings to the scene. In life, it means embracing what is, staying open to opportunities, and noticing the subtle “quantum flirts”—those small nudges life gives us toward possibility that often go unnoticed. ✅ 2. Say “…And” Avoid blocking ideas or turning them down. Instead, build on them. Whether in a conversation, brainstorming session, or tackling a challenge, adding “and” instead of “but” fosters growth and creativity. ✅ 3. Stay Present Be in the moment. Listen deeply, with curiosity, and react naturally. Overthinking takes you out of flow; presence keeps you aligned with opportunities. ✅ 4. No Mistakes, Only Gifts! My favourite rule! Every challenge is an opportunity—you just have to shift your perspective. Don’t second-guess yourself. Trust your inner wisdom and stay in the flow. Confidence comes from knowing that you can turn anything into a gift. This mindset brings lightness and playfulness to life. True improvisation isn’t about competition—it’s about collaboration. It’s a game where assists are more important than goals. It’s about saying “yes…and” to the people around you, whether they’re colleagues, friends, or family. When you adopt this approach, others are more likely to listen, engage, and co-create with you. Improvisation is Everywhere We can improvise in so many aspects of our lives: Leadership Negotiation Interviews Public speaking Managing crises Navigating relationships Adapting to change Every day presents opportunities to say yes…and, to stay present with curiosity, to trust our inner wisdom, and to embrace the confidence of knowing that there are no wrong turns—only unexpected ones. Ready to embrace the improvisation mindset and see how life shifts for you? Let’s explore the possibilities together!

From fear to trust! The start of a new year is a great time to reflect on our mission and purpose. As a coach, I believe in “walking the talk”, so I’ve taken time to reconnect with my "why" over the holiday period. Here is mine: supporting as many people as possible to move from fear to trust. I do that by practicing what I call "foundational coaching". It focuses on addressing the root causes rather than just the symptoms. Why? Because lasting change, growth, and transformation only happen when we tackle the underlying issues, our fears. Clients often come with specific challenges: dealing with a difficult boss, helping a disengaged teenager, feeling bored or unmotivated at work, or struggling in a relationship. While supporting the clients in planning and moving forward is very important, it rarely leads to deep, lasting change. And that is because without addressing the root causes, the same problems will resurface in different forms. As humans, we are most of the time driven by fear: fear of not being approved, losing control or feeling unsafe. This is how we are wired. And that is ok. But we also have the ability to choose. By becoming "response-able," we can shift from reacting out of fear to leading from love and trust. This shift empowers us to focus on what we can control—ourselves. Change begins with the understanding that we are the creators of our life experience. It takes courage to embrace this truth, but it’s also incredibly liberating. By stopping spending time and energy in defending ourselves and proving that we are right in front of others, we can go all in, tap into our deeper wisdom and be confidently ourselves. Over to you now. What’s your "why"? What are you committed to? What is your promise to the world you live in? These are not easy questions, and the support of a coach would be helpful, but start thinking about your peak experiences, those moments in your life where you were open, present, powerful, full of energy, and excited. What did you feel? What were your thoughts? How did you feel in your body? What were the common themes? Once you’re clear on your purpose, try to reflect on the "what" (your actions) and the "how" (the strengths and skills you can leverage). Voila’, you have the most powerful tool: your mission statement. Investing time in this self-reflection is one of the best choices you can make!

Networking = people helping people We might not like to hear this, but networking is the key to growing and performing in the job you are in now and it can be the key to finding a job you love. It's the way to get things started and stop procrastinating and "not feeling ready yet". It's sowing seeds. And, it is also a great tool for self-development. I know. Most likely, words like unauthentic, manipulative, and self-interested come to mind when mentioning the concept of networking. Networking often gets a bad reputation, so I like to think of it as connecting. It’s people helping people, sharing information about yourself, and exploring new possibilities. The foundation of effective networking is clarity about what you can offer and what you need. This self-awareness will guide you to approach connections intentionally, focusing on quality over quantity. It helps to consider three types of networks in our life, as highlighted in the Harvard Business Review article “The 3 networks you need”: Operational: These are people you rely on to perform your current job effectively and the ones that rely on you. Developmental: Mentors and trusted individuals who provide guidance and personal support. Strategic: Connections that can help you achieve your future career goals. Then try to identify which type of networks might have gaps and require your attention the most. A useful tool is the Constellation Exercise : a graphic representation of your connections in the three different networks. 1 - Grab a piece of paper and draw your 3 current network constellations. Include yourself and map out key connections. Be creative and use symbols (squares, or triangles) and different thickness lines to represent the quality of the connections. 2 - Reflect on: Where you are positioned? The number and quality of connections? Any noticeable gaps or challenges? 3 - Visualize and draw your ideal network constellation. Identify the changes you’d like to see and the relationships you need to cultivate. 4 - Action plan: from this visualization, define three specific steps you can take in the next three months to align your current network to your ideal vision. For example: Reach out to someone who is already in the kind of job you are interested in and ask for 15 minutes of their time to hear their stories, their likes and their challenges, or their opinion on a particular topic. You can research these people online or by asking your existing connections. Join professional groups relevant to the possible position or career you are exploring. If you have mentors, leverage their experience and personal connections. Strengthen weak connections through meaningful conversations or by offering collaboration. To summarize: Networking helps in several key ways: Information Gathering : Provides insights into roles, industries, and opportunities. Personal Branding : Offers opportunities to refine how you present your skills, values, and achievements. Confidence Building : Encourages you to articulate your unique strengths. Visibility : Boosts your presence and helps decision-makers remember you. If you are in the process of changing jobs, as Peter Drucker reminds us “If you can't measure it, you can't improve it”. So, keep a record of the people you’ve connected with, along with any follow-up actions. Regularly revisit this log to maintain relationships and stay organized in your networking efforts. Ultimately, people hire people, not CVs. Even if you don’t meet every requirement for a job, your personality and initiative can leave a lasting impression. By nurturing the connections in your personal and professional life, and by sharing with clarity your contribution and your aspiration, you are constantly sowing seeds and tending future possibilities that might open up with time. Oh! The last thing. Even though connecting with people comes easier and more natural to extroverts, introverts can also find a way to nurture relationships: for example through one-to-one meetings, or by asking someone to accompany them at networking events. Once again, we have to find our way, the way that works for us and is most effective. Have fun!

Why not be more like your heroes? Let’s give ourselves permission to explore a bold idea: steal from your heroes! Before you think I’ve lost my mind, let me explain. As Pablo Picasso famously said, “the bad artists imitate, the great artists steal” . We’re not talking about passively imitating or replicating others. That approach is limiting and dangerous. It’s not about comparing ourselves to others or falling into the envy trap that social media often encourages. Instead, we’re discussing the power of being inspired: exploring the qualities and traits of those we admire and making them our own in a fresh and original way. Consider one of your heroes. What is heroic about them? This is an opportunity to expand ourselves, grow new and genuine parts of our identity, and reach out to play those piano keys that are not straight in front of us, but that are still part of who we are. This is also the secret to tend to our creativity and curiosity about the world and who we can become if we let go of the self-imposed limits for the sake of being authentic. This is explained in the work of Hermina Ibarra in her HBR article “The Authenticity Paradox”. While knowing who you are, developing self-awareness is foundational and extremely important - it’s the first step I take in my program with my clients - it’s equally important to not let the commitment to our true self compromise our growth and development. In other words, we need to expand our story, not be confined by it. This is my tip for you, inspired by Marshall Goldsmith's latest book “The Earned Life”: Write down the names of one or more of your heroes Notice what you admire about them. What values, skills, habits, and tricks could you “steal”? Now, cross out their names and write yours instead Be open and curious and notice what idea/aspiration appears. What can you do to embody the qualities that impress you most about them? This exercise may start as a small seed of an idea. With curiosity, courage and patience, it can give you the clarity to find the next sustainable steps you can take in your personal or professional life. So, honor your beautiful self, and also be open, to expand your comfort zone . Embrace the journey of growth and becoming what you have yet to be—and don’t forget to express gratitude to your heroes along the way!

Start the Day with a Positive Mind! As the summer holidays come to an end and the school year begins, many of us find ourselves returning to a more regular rhythm in our work and daily lives. This time presents a perfect opportunity to introduce positive changes that can enhance the quality of our lives. As a coach, one of my primary goals is to support clients in creating sustainable, positive habits. Our lives are shaped by the routines and habits we establish over time, so it’s essential to cultivate as many positive ones as possible. The one habit I encourage you to experiment with in the next few weeks is the practice of energizing your brain to shift from the autopilot mode of our survival brain to a more optimistic, solution-oriented, and empathetic mindset. In the Buddhist tradition, the first phase of meditation, known as Samatha, emphasizes mental focus and concentration on a single element, such as your breath. The objective of this practice is to achieve presence, peace, mental clarity, and openness. Positive Intelligence reframes this tradition by suggesting that we focus on any physical sensations (breath, touch, taste, smell…) to enhance our mental fitness. By using these sensations as anchors to bring us into the present moment, we can support a shift from a state of fight, flight, or freeze to a mindset of safety and trust. This shift energizes a different part of our brain, allowing us to think more empathetically and optimistically. In one of our earlier newsletters, I identified three key factors that contribute to successfully establishing new habits (based on research, working with my clients, and personal experience): Link New Habits to Existing Ones : By connecting a new habit to an established routine, you create a natural pathway for integration. Start Small : Breaking down new habits into manageable steps makes them less overwhelming and easier to incorporate into your routine. Celebrate Your Progress : Acknowledging your efforts and rewarding yourself for small victories reinforces the new habit and keeps you motivated, thanks to the release of the neurotransmitter dopamine. This positive reinforcement is crucial for long-term success. Returning to our goal of energizing our brains, mornings, rich with established routines, offer a great opportunity to start the day with positivity. Taking a moment to fill your cup and ground yourself before diving into the day’s demands can make a significant difference. Here are my tips for you: Practice Mental Fitness using Existing Routines : Use your morning routines as opportunities to practice mindfulness. For example: when you wake up and put your feet on the ground, notice the sensation of the floor beneath your feet and the weight of your body pressing down. When you wash your face: Pay attention to the water temperature on your skin, the smell of the soap, and the texture of your skin. While making your first cup of tea or coffee, focus on your breath, the warmth of the cup, the aroma, and the taste as you sip. And so on. Use your creativity, experiment and find the ones you enjoy the most. Explore Your Breathing : If you can wake up a few minutes earlier than usual, consider incorporating a short Samatha meditation. Sit comfortably, with your back straight, and focus on your breathing, notice the air that enters and exits your nostrils, the raising and falling of your stomach. When the mind wanders, bring it back to your breathing. Simple, easy, without judgment. Notice how it affects your state of mind. This practice will deepen your connection to yourself, bring you to the present moment, reduce anxiety, and enhance your mental fitness. Give it a try! Acknowledge and Celebrate : After these mindful moments, take a moment to acknowledge how you feel and celebrate! No matter how small these practices are, you did it! So... “Mornings are made of gold” I couldn’t agree more. By integrating these practices into your morning routine, you will get mentally fitter, and create a foundation for positivity that sets you up for the day ahead. Embrace the power of small, intentional changes to cultivate a more fulfilling life!

Let's learn to fail! Let's start by saying that failing is hard . It threatens our sense of self, often evoking feelings of shame and a fear of not belonging or being accepted. Our natural inclination isn't to face failure constructively; this fear can undermine our potential and lead us to dwell on negative thoughts, wasting valuable time and resources. Interestingly, we’re often told that failure is desirable, that we must "fail fast, fail often". The problem is that neither approach works because it skips the important step of distinguishing the good failures from the bad. In her latest book, "The Right Kind of Wrong", Amy Edmondson - the world’s most influential organizational psychologist - creates awareness of the various forms of failure and offers a framework to reshape our habits, enabling us to learn and evolve from these experiences. Failures are not equal , as the author explains, there are three main categories: Basic failures , "not the right kind of wrong," occur within familiar circumstances due to factors such as inattention, neglect, or overconfidence. These failures are preventable and typically do not bring new insights or discoveries because they happen in known territories. While accepting our fallibility is essential, implementing systems such as checklists, preparation and training can help mitigate these basic failures. Complex failures , similarly, do not fall in the category of "the right kind of wrong." They also occur within familiar settings but involve multiple causes and often show warning signs. Additionally, they may involve external uncontrollable factors. To address complex failures, the author advocates for awareness of early indicators and fostering psychological safety, enabling individuals to speak up when warning signs emerge. In contrast, intelligent failures are "the right kind of wrong". They have four key attributes: they occur in uncharted territory, present opportunities for advancement and learning, are informed by valuable knowledge and do not result in excessive waste. For example, scientists and inventors excel at navigating intelligent failures by approaching experimentation with curiosity and playfulness, aiming to expand knowledge and discoveries within their fields. My first tip for you is to notice the different types of failure: 1- In the context of basic and complex failures, this awareness prompts us to simultaneously accept our fallibility and humanity while actively working to minimize and prevent them. 2- in the context of intelligent failure, awareness empowers us to embrace these failures as opportunities for courageous growth and learning . This entails first recognizing and addressing the cognitive biases that make accepting failure difficult and then learning to reframe failure as part of the process, as a natural part of growth and exploration. How do we do that? Here is my second tip . Our innate response to failure, rooted in the limbic system, aims to protect us from the deep fear of rejection by our social group. The prospect of being cast out triggers intense feelings of unworthiness and undermines our self-esteem. This fear-driven response fuels confirmation bias, blinding us to alternative perspectives and hindering our ability to process information objectively, thus impeding our capacity for learning and growth. Resulting from various scientific disciplines such as neuroscience, cognitive-behavioral therapy, and performance science, Positive Intelligence presents a life-changing three-step strategy that empowers us to transform challenges and failures into opportunities for growth. Notice the negative thoughts and emotions we're experiencing, and create awareness. Support our brain to shift away from a flight or fight state to allow broader perspectives, creative thinking, and innovation by tuning into our bodily sensations (such as focusing on our breath! Deliberately choose our response - What helps us move forward? In life, failures are inevitable; there's no guarantee that our efforts will always yield success. Despite our best intentions and diligent work, outcomes may not align with our expectations. We cannot control life, but we can learn to recognize the type of failure we are facing and always choose our response ! As Viktor Frankl wisely stated, "Between stimulus and response, there is space. In that space lies the power to choose our response. It's within our response that our growth and freedom are found." I hope these tips will make failing less scary, or dare I say, an opportunity! Let’s continue growing together! I’m always here for you, Cristina

Time to rewrite your story? We all love stories. A good story creates trust, gives meaning, captures hearts, and connects. A good story is easily remembered and retold. Through storytelling, humanity has written history: around the bonfire, painted on cave walls or passed down verbally from one generation to another. With storytelling, we make sense of events, of the world. Research shows that stories create such a deep emotional connection that the brain waves of the listeners mirror the ones of the teller. I use a powerful tool in my coaching practice with all my clients and every time and again it has proven to be one of the most impactful exercises in my repertoire. Inspired by Positive Intelligence, I guide my coachees through an exercise called “the perfectly written story of your life” . The strong and beautiful assumption and mindset to use through the storytelling of our life is that nothing is ever wasted and that every single event, positive or negative, can be seen as an opportunity and a gift (even though at times we feel not ready yet). Our life might look meandric and random at first, but by reframing the pivotal moments of our life with this powerful perspective, we manage to: Make sense of the pieces of our life Define our identity by finding common threads and clues that help us clarify our values and sense of direction Rewrite our story in a wiser and more positive way Create a bigger frame to allow our development. Help us to completely accept ourselves Inform us of who we want to become. So, ready to give it a go? Grab a pen and a notebook and set aside 10-15 min . These are the steps for the exercise: Divide your life into 5 main chapters from when you were born until today (organize them in a way that makes sense considering the main events of your life) Think about the formative and pivotal moments in each chapter, notice your triumphs and failures Get curious and reflect on how these experiences have shaped you, your values, and your beliefs and helped you become who you are as a friend, parent, colleague, leader, etc. Ask yourself the question: what is the gift that this chapter gave me, that is still important for me today and will be in the future? Finally, what might be the main aspects, and ingredients of the new chapter that still need to be written? You have been through all those adventures in the perfectly written story of your life, but, what’s next for you? Notice the sense of authorship and groundedness that this exercise gives you. What do you know now about what motivates you? What impact do you want to have? What are your values? How do you want to show up? Here’s a quote for you: “Sometimes it is only when you see where you have been, that you can tell where you are heading” William Bridges Make your story your own guide and motivator , find acceptance, belonging, and strength in it. Give yourself this beautiful gift! I’m always here for you, Cristina

As adults we often believe we are done with growing and changing. However, science, and in particular the concept of neuroplasticity, teaches us something very different. As adults, our brain has still the ability to change. We can learn new things, enhance existing cognitive capabilities and strengthen lost or declining functions. Coaching is all about adult development One of the ways coaching allows us to continue growing is by r ediscovering our marginalized skills and strengths . Using the metaphor of a piano, we tend to play only the comfortable keys we find in front of us, the ones we have played many times, even creating a very pleasant (or not-so-pleasant) tune that others are so used to hearing. However, our keyboard is made of many more octaves than the ones we have in front of us, higher and lower in pitch, which if played, could deliver a more compelling and unique tune. How can we play the least used part of our keyboard? I love to tap into 3 main strategies. 1) As positive intelligence teaches us, we can use our saboteurs* to reclaim our strength“ . Saboteurs take our greatest strengths and convert them into our greatest weakness by overusing or abusing that strength.” Let’s take as an example the pleaser saboteur. If the pleaser is one of your top saboteurs, you are very empathic, loving and giving, tuned into others’ feelings and needs, emotionally self-aware, and with high emotional intelligence. Those are beautiful strengths you can tap into and use to easily connect with others, truly understand their needs, and show up as authentic and generous. These strengths can support you professionally and personally. Wow! Initially, it can be uncomfortable to become aware of our saboteurs and the negative impact and cost they can have in our life. However, they can also be used to reclaim our natural inner strengths. 2) Mirror exercise : sometimes what gets on our nerves about other people are areas of development for us, marginalized aspects that we unconsciously long for. As ORSC (Organisation, relations, and system coaching) teaches us, our partners become our mirror : what I see in you is really a mirror of myself! For example, I might be triggered by someone who is very relaxed and playful, in truth, their lightness might be something I long for in my life. Consider a personal or professional relationship in your life and notice what aspect irritates you. Then ask yourself how curious are you about bringing that aspect more into your life. Intriguing right? 3) The 2% rule : when someone attributes something to us that we believe is incorrect, there is always at least 2% truth in what they say. If we decide to follow this rule, if we can examine and own that 2% we can integrate successfully marginalized parts of us, become aware of them, and extend our range. Also, this supports us in being less defensive. We are converting a critique into an opportunity for growth. Beautiful! Marginalized selves are important resources within ourselves that get forgotten with time. It is so reassuring to know that they are still there for us, we just need to reach a little further on our imaginary keyboard by reframing our saboteurs and by learning from our relationships. I'd love to hear your thoughts! I’m always here for you. Cristina P.S. Get in touch if you need support with any of the strategies above! * Saboteurs: inner strategies and thought patterns we developed early in life to protect us from potential emotional risks, that are now outdated.